Monthly Archives: March 2012

pieces of me

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When I returned from Taiwan in January, I wanted to apply for Taiwanese citizenship. I still have my original baby passport issued when we moved from Okinawa to the States, and I was born in Taipei, so I figured it would be possible to re-apply.  I was excited about the idea of having dual citizenship and reclaiming a part of my Taiwanese heritage. It was suggested that I contact TECO (The Taiwanese Economic and Cultural Office). So, I called the TECO office in LA a couple weeks ago. The woman I spoke with first asked if I spoke Mandarin. Sadly, although I’m studying Mandarin, I’m not quite at the level yet to carry on a conversation about renewing my passport. She informed me that I needed to send for the family household document from my sister in Taiwan and asked me repeatedly if I still had my original passport. I assured her that I did. She was not rude in any way. I think she was just making sure that I really did have a passport issued from Taiwan. Upon receiving the household document, she asked that I contact her again to proceed.

Yesterday, I received the household document from my sister. Yea! I called TECO to find out what the next steps were. Again, the same woman asked if I spoke Mandarin then asked several times if my passport was issued in Taiwan or China. It took me a couple of minutes to convince her by reading my passport that indeed it was issued in Taiwan, not China.

And now the next stage is to complete the passport application form, which is available online thank goodness. After that, I will have to send the completed app signed by a notary republic, a copy of the household document, my baby passport, a copy of my current US passport, 2 photos for my new passport, a $50 check, and a return self-addressed envelope to TECO. I’m so grateful my mom kept my passport despite the fact that she never revealed that I had one, nor that she still had it in her possession, and that I found it. My mom did however keep newspaper clippings of my U.S. naturalization ceremony and my naturalization certificate, another important document since I don’t have an original birth certificate. Today I went to download the passport application form. I clicked on the link and there was there form – in Mandarin. I didn’t see any link leading to an English language form, so I called the woman back to see if there was one. Unfortunately, there is not, so I will enlist the help of my Mandarin tutor, or an acquaintance of ours who is Taiwanese. More incentive for me to study my Mandarin harder!

Just before hanging up, I asked the woman if I was still a Taiwanese citizen, even though my sister told me weeks ago that I was. I just wanted reassurance that it was true. “Yes, you are still citizen – don’t worry,” was her reply. I felt relieved, pleased, thrilled. Really, I always had been a national but didn’t know it. Why am I so pleased? After 40 something years of rejecting my birth heritage, I feel more and more drawn to it. I can’t say that every transracially adopted person will feel the same way, but for me it’s been an awakening. It comes as a bit of a surprise even to me that I’m heading in this direction, but it feels right. Little pieces of my identity are coming together. It’s been shown that the identity piece for transracial adoptees is typically a complex one and that reuniting with one’s birth family, or even connecting with one’s birth culture helps adoptees feel more “whole.” For me, I was already beginning to arrive at a sense of wholeness before meeting my biological family. I think life experience and having my own family has been part of that process. Meeting my sisters and birth family brought joy. Yes, also a sense of completeness in that my search for them culminated in our reunion. I connected with my birth culture in the most profound way, and I learned more about my birth parents and why I was placed for adoption. But there were many factors that came in waves over the years that helped me develop that sense of wholeness. Am I there yet? I think like anyone, whether transracially adopted or not, we all go through so many different stages during our lives. Accepting that I’m Taiwanese has been like taking one step forward, two steps back, three steps forward and so forth, because it’s been a long road full of surprises, denial, questioning, searching, and finally acceptance. Being adopted is part of who I am and always will be. Finding my birth family and owning my Taiwanese citizenship is another leg in the journey – a really significant one.

taiwanese milk candy

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Back in January, I came home loaded with all kinds of gifts from my two sisters in Taiwan. They were so generous, and it was completely unexpected. They actually bought me an extra surplus-sized suitcase in order to bring everything home! I’m sure glad they did because there was no way all those gifts would have made it back with me without that extra suitcase. I came back to Arizona with pineapple cakes, packages of high mountain tea, milk candies, cookies, fresh jerky from one of the best shops in Hualien, and other specialty items from Taiwan. My family and I polished off the pineapple cakes and jerky within a week. We’re still enjoying some of the wonderful candies though. Taiwanese nougat candy. They come in different flavors: vanilla, green tea, coffee, chocolate, etc.

The white candies are the original milk flavor well known in Taiwan. The dark ones are sort of a cross between caramel and coffee. The color reminds me a bit of karo syrup. They’re soft and chewy with a bit of a crunch from the nuts inside.

Each candy is individually wrapped. On the front of the wrapper, it says “Delicious”, “Tasty & Pleasant to Taste.” That’s the only thing I could read because it was the only thing written in English!

There’s a clear outer layer wrapped around the candy called candy paper, or as my elder sister called it, sweet paper. She told me you just eat it along with the candy. At first, I couldn’t get used to eating a piece of candy with a wrapper still around it even though it’s very thin, tastes sweet, and basically melts in your mouth. After a few more, though, I got used to it. I love the nuts inside. It looks kind of like taffy and has a similar texture, although it’s a little more thick and chewy. The original milk flavored candies taste like milk, but sweeter. I can’t decide if I like the dark or white ones better.

I took some to work to share with my co-workers, and it disappeared within a week. I would love to try some of the other flavors in the future – maybe on my next trip to Taiwan.

Taiwanese candies! Yum!!!

ancient tea set

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When we lived in Okinawa, my parents must have enjoyed the culture. Mom bought some beautiful housewares while there, which came with us to the States. One of the most precious to me is a coffee, tea and sake set that I can only guess is Japanese. It looks ancient to me, although I’m not sure how ancient it really is. Mom had it stored in some kitchen cabinets back home. I made sure to confiscate it and send it back home to Arizona before our old house sold. I’ve done research online to try and figure out if it has a pattern name, but to no avail. The set includes a teapot and several teacups, a sake set, including tiny little sake cups, a large punch bowl, a pitcher, coffee pot and coffee cups, a sugar jar and creamer, and candlestick holders. The porcelain is very thick and heavy, not thin like china. It’s almost an antiquish pale blue-green in color with soft charcoal colored bottoms and crackled appearance both on the outside and inside. There are also heart shaped inlays cut into each piece. I can’t imagine how they did that, and each piece has gold trimmings and a gold horse and/or butterfly on the outside and bottom inside. I think it’s absolutely beautiful and am so glad to have it in my possession.

This is pretty much the whole set, with the exception of a few other cups.

This is my favorite piece. I love the bamboo handle.

This is the very large punch bowl. Each piece in the set has the same gold horse adorned on the outside.

The bottom inside of the punch bowl has two horses

In addition to the gold horse, both the teapot and coffee pot have what looks like a butterfly sitting on a branch on the other side. I’m not sure if it’s a butterfly, but it kind of looks like it.

This is the inside of one of the small coffee cups.

This is the sake set. The little sake cups look much larger here than they really are.

Sugar Jar and Creamer

I have the set displayed in some of our kitchen cabinets with glass panels. However, the cabinets just don’t do it justice. One day, it would be nice to display it in a china cabinet, or something similar. Wish I knew where my mom bought the set and if there’s any background or significance to the horse and butterfly.

natwa II 24th annual convention

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I’m speaking at the upcoming NATWA II (North American Taiwanese Women’s Association) Convention! I was invited to join the speaker’s panel to share a little of my adoption story, as well as to address the topic of identity, more specifically the journey to my Taiwanese identity. The NATWA II Convention is held annually. This year’s theme is “Love and Compassion.” I’m thrilled to have the opportunity to meet so many other Taiwanese American and Canadian women, as well as to rub shoulders with the other speakers who include Marilyn Fu, screenwriter, and Victoria Linchong, actress, writer, producer, and director. Furthermore, I’m excited about becoming a part of the Taiwanese American community. I’ve never attended anything like this related to my Taiwanese heritage.

NATWA II is an association bringing together 1.5 and 2nd generation Taiwanese American and Canadian women. Its parent organization is NATWA, which consists of 1st generation Taiwanese women, mothers, grandmothers, aunts. The purposes of NATWA II include:

(1) to establish a network consisting of 1.5- and 2nd-generation Taiwanese American and Canadian women.
(2) to cultivate and promote talents among young Taiwanese American and Canadian women.
(3) to preserve Taiwanese culture and promote Taiwanese American and Canadian identity.

You can check out NATWA II’s website and find more information on the convention and speakers at http://natwa2.org/. Both NATWA and NATWA II will present separate and joint programs. The convention will be held in San Jose/Silicon Valley, CA from April 19-22. I’m looking forward to it!