Monthly Archives: April 2024

waning gibbous

Good afternoon or evening wherever you may be. We’re heading into a new month very soon. I have some wishes for May that I hope come to pass. We shall see.

I’ve been struggling with hyper-fatigue for the past couple of months. It’s worsened and become more difficult in the last month to do anything other than make it in to work and back home. I boxed yesterday and felt really tired afterward. Usually, boxing energizes me, but yesterday, I needed to take several little breaks during class. I have very stiff, sore muscles today, as it’s been nearly 3 weeks since I last boxed due to fatigue. Stretching is in order, but there is a part of me that wants to do more strenuous exercise, like boxing. I miss it. The weekends are just not long enough for restoration, and most days, I wish I could just stay in bed and do nothing. As such, I haven’t been writing as much as I’d like to. Just no energy to think or for creativity. I’m hoping that by Fall, my schedule has changed so that I’ll have more time away from work, particularly summer, winter, and spring recesses. At times, I feel angry that work takes the better part of my day and energy, and yet one has to make a living. So, I do my best at self-care, although I eat way too much ice cream, lol.

We’re also in the first phase after a Full Moon, the Waning Gibbous phase. The moon’s energy is decreasing, and it’s a good time to focus inward. The waning period is associated with letting go of that which does not serve you, e.g., self-limiting beliefs or fears that are holding you back, changing one’s schedule! There will be a New Moon on May 8th. I love New Moons and like to set new intentions in the hopes that with focus, time, and energy, my intentions have come to fruition by the time the Full Moon arrives, or are at least heading in that direction. I journal my intentions to help me commit and map out necessary steps toward achieving them. A Full Moon arrives every 29.5 days roughly. Our next Full Moon is on May 23rd, and it’s known as the Flower Moon – it coincides with the blooming of many flowers in the northern hemisphere. But first things first – focusing inward and letting go of things that no longer serve. Can you tell that I love talking about the moon? There are some things I’m working on letting go of in order to conserve my energy. Unfortunately, socializing is one of them. So less time with groups of people. Solitude is restorative – another reason I avoided the gym, or perhaps an excuse not to go???

Wherever you are in the world, I’m wishing you a very good and healthful week. Thanks again for following/subscribing to my blog. May you look inward and let go of that which no longer serves 🙂 🌖 🌕 🌔


Photo by Guillermo Ferla on Unsplash

songbird

is the answer no?
how can i change your mind if so?
where is the space to feel again,
fly free, dream,
nevermore penned in
like a caged bird whose wings
have been clipped,
a songbird unable to sing
show me a glimmer
where all is bright and shimmers
where my bones no longer rattle
there are no systems to battle
the kindness of a smile,
a twinkle in the eye
would set the world aright


Songbird, Fleetwood Mac. Do you have a favorite Fleetwood Mac song? I actually didn’t like this song previously, but have grown to love it. The 1977 Live version is even more lovely. I thought the song went well with the tenor of this poem. It’s one of those times in life in which I just have to keep pushing through. It’s not how I wish to live, a temporary hold before there can be light.

Photo by Joshua J. Cotten on Unsplash

beneath the silver disco ball

strumming on my Taylor
beneath the silver disco ball
putting words to paper
tales of shrooms and alcohol
knowing you knowing me
we made it to the other side
ABBA on old vinyl
it’s been a hella crazy ride
how i pined for what’s his name
i was always cryin’
you said, he’s not worth it, babe
my eyes you took to dryin’
you’re like the king
to my dancing queen
dance the nights away
beneath the silver disco ball
more days to dream and slay!


This poem was written in jest, seriously, except I do have a disco ball hanging from the ceiling in my tiny living room space and a Taylor guitar. And, I do also appreciate my good friends. This is about having that friend you troll around with, the one who always has your back, especially when you’ve had a few too many 😂 Cheers to ABBA and friendship. Take a Chance On Me, by ABBA. Never gets old!

Photo by Harry Grout on Unsplash

toward hope

hit the snooze at half past six
another insane morning
early to bed by nine o’clock
god, i’m so boring
eyes are bleary, body weary
can’t get outta bed
blast some heavy metal,
but still feel like a ton of lead
slingin’ mud,
wade through the muck
movin’ in slow motion,
you’d think i’d have a rhythm down
instead of this commotion
yet, drowning never felt so brutish
am i at my edge?
or being far too shallow
to which shall i allege?
i gather up my strength
defy this bullet to my head
look to my sweet angels above
toward hope may i be led


More by The Warning. Thanks Fox Reviews Rock for introducing me to this great band, a Mexican-born sister trio, and their new album! I dig girl bands, and metal, too ❤ Will be jamming to more of their music. 

Do you ever try singing your poetry? I changed the poem around a bit after singing it so it sounded more metrical or rhythmic. It goes really well with the beat of this song, LOL.

Photo by Aryan Dhiman on Unsplash

dream me a dream

dream me a dream
where peaceful waters flow
wading barefoot through the ripples,
time moving slow

dream me a dream
of misty painted raindrops
leaving stains upon my skin
like white velvet polka dots

dream me a dream
of wind whistling through the pines
the scent of green lingers,
and drowsy clouds sigh


Photo by Meritt Thomas on Unsplash

the weeping willow

listen to the soughing of
the weeping willow tree
bending gently with the wind,
swaying as she pleases

sallow leaves drift elegantly
velvet twigs of green and brown
sweeping always, bending low
to kiss the earthy ground

she stands with pride, fluidity
a brave, bold soul is she
can stand against the strongest wind
yet give pollen to the bees

let us honor her in stillness,
her beauty give us breath
may she dwell beside the mossy pond
her crown to always bloometh


Dance of the North by Joanne Shenandoah, who was of the Oneida Indian Nation. This song was played during a music therapy conference I attended today. It was played in a training using Guided Imagery & Music, a specific type of music therapy. I fell in love with the song, which inspired this poem.

We had a beautiful weeping willow tree in our backyard when I was a kid. I watched it grow until its crown grew to be beautiful and full. It gave me much joy and wonder over the years.

Photo by Fran on Unsplash

jump the highest bridge

my dear,

i would not love you any less

if your life turned out a giant mess

i would take you in my arms

and cover you in kisses,

let the rain pour down

for you, i’ll go the distance

to make you smile for miles and miles,

jump the highest bridge

for you, dear, i am fearless,

and all your doubts are meaningless,

may they float away on the nearest cloud,

for surely you can do without

the vexing chatter in your head

may they be drowned out by the sweet whisper

of promise and my hand upon your heart,

to always protect, to always guard

two imperfect humans on this journey are we,

finding our way through life’s little miseries

striving to be light, fighting to be free

one thing is true and will forever be,

you, my dear, have always

an undying love in me


This poem was inspired by a song, Keep Breathing, by Ingrid Michaelson. I haven’t stopped listening to it since MyGenXerLife posted an article featuring the song. There’s something about the contour of the melody, the lyricism, that catches my breath.

Photo by Sean Pierce on Unsplash

freedom comes at a price

it seems that freedom comes at a price,

a privilege rather than individual right

how i’ve fought for freedom

forever and a day,

free to feel exactly how i say

without restraint, without complaint

from those who judge my particular state

no longer shackled by doubts and fear

i’ve declared this my year

to come home to me

my hopes and dreams shall come to be

never lose myself in another human

or some other dubious, grand illusion

for as surely as trust cost me freedom

i chose a higher path;

i refuse to be beaten


Freedom 90, George Michael. Lyrics here. So much about this video that I love, like how everyone is moving their body, dancing. George Michael was such a great dancer. He’s so into the music. I’m listening to his tunes from the 80s and 90s. Forgotten how good it is. Freedom is precious. I’m grateful everyday to be free and autonomous and hope to never take it for granted.

Photo by Simon Berger on Unsplash

music rocks

Good Sunday to you! No new poem today, well maybe later 🙂 I’ve been in a music therapy conference all day on strengths-based improvisation. The conference is all week – gotta earn those continuing ed credits. It was a blast. I haven’t connected with other music therapists in eons, so although it was virtual, it was a lovely experience to meet with other musicians/music therapists online. We did some improvising on whatever instruments we had on hand. I played my djembe, a couple of frame drums and my new e-piano, which sadly, I don’t play often enough. I feel so lucky to be a musician and to have had the opportunities I’ve had to study music. And I very much love sharing music with others.

Drumming is so near and dear to my heart. I enjoy it almost as much as playing the piano. When I studied piano performance, I was terrible at improvising- literally froze. But when I studied music therapy, I learned that I could improvise (on keyboard mostly), play by ear, and read lead sheets pretty easily after I built some skill. I took drum facilitator trainings through HealthRhythms and am starting a healing drum circles program at work next academic year – was awarded a small grant to buy more drums. All of this to say that I love music so much. I cannot imagine this life without it. There is a song or a piece for nearly every emotion, mood, occasion, event, even if to just dance around to in the privacy of your own space.

It would be a dream to conduct an orchestra. I took conducting in undergrad, but have absolutely no experience, except practicing in class. I remember my professor telling some of us we looked like we were stirring pudding, lol! I especially love watching female conductors because – well, they’re just so badass. There’s a female conductor and violinist, Karina Canellakis, to guest conduct the LA Philharmonic later this month. I’d like to go, but traffic is always such a pain to the Walt Disney Concert Hall. I hate the traffic! One of my favorite female conductors is Mirga Gražinyte-Tyla . We have the same birthday! Another is Elisabeth Fuchs. I linked a YouTube video of Fuchs conducting the Zagreb Philharmonic Orchestra and Choir Zvjezdice. The performance features cello soloist, HAUSER, performing Benedictus from The Armed Man: A Mass for Peace by Karl Jenkins (Hendon Music Inc BMI) at his classical solo concert, which was held at Lisinski Concert Hall in Zagreb (October 2017). I literally cried the first time I heard this piece, it’s so beautiful. I hope you give it a listen and enjoy it.

This is also Coachella week, so been tuning into YouTube Coachella 2024 Live! Loved The Last Dinner Party and Bleachers last night. Cheers to music and more of it! Thanks for reading this little blurb about my deep love of music.


Hauser performing Benedictus from The Armed Man: A Mass for Peace, Karl Jenkins. Conductor, Elisabeth Fuchs. Lyrics here.


Photo by Andrea Zanenga on Unsplash

a fireside lullaby

sing to me a lullaby

of peace and joy and loves gone by

take my hand and let’s get high

on fragrant blooms, the midnight sky

dance with the wind to our hearts content

at home with the redwoods, my dearest friends

nature beckons promising solace

for she is divine and perfectly flawless

want to be like the angels as i journey forth

seeking truth, giving love,

wings to fly evermore North


The Rising, Essie Jain. A beautiful, poetic piece. 

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

rise to the moon

time, friend or foe?

i most certainly do not know,

except it is fleeting;

is it cheating me?

lest i be the consummate late bloomer,

late to the game and no sooner

did time pass like a flash

of lightning in the sky

terribly frightening,

i’m second to last

dying to my past

and grieving what i missed,

falling behind as though misaligned

if only i knew how to stop

time from slipping away

shall i make the most of every day

within the walls of this present life?

rise to the moon,

and soon, very soon

i’ll catch a dream,

perhaps even in you

down a crooked path i went

when i think of time gone by,
all the things i’ve missed
hopes and dreams
and visions,
the love that i so wished
would somehow save me from myself,
take away the ache
yet down a crooked path i went,
is it no wonder i didn’t break?
should have listened to my gut
far too young and trusting
learned the hard way, cut by cut
and was left with nothing
sold my soul to lies, so lost
still in the end was found
my soul re-emerged;
i saved myself,
and here am i on a new path
paved with life’s hard-knock experiences
though not what i set out on,
it has made all the difference


It’s All Happening Now, BAERD. Full lyrics here. Life really is all happening now, around me everywhere. So many changes in the past several months. I’m not sure when or where I’ll land…

Photo by Levi Bare on Unsplash

total eclipse of the sun

the moon decided to eclipse today
the fair sun along its merry way
between the earth and brightest star
a path predestined from afar
a phenomenal sight to behold
another not to occur for years, I’m told
though not on the path of totality
awed nonetheless by our Celestial Galaxy
a time to awaken, heal and expand
set your intentions, expect the grand
life is too short, we have only today
live with intention, live to play
for work is a necessity, will always be there
but a life well lived, truly one cannot spare


All right, so this is not the best poem, but i felt moved to honor the solar eclipse today. And, I wrote it during my lunch break, lol. I went for a walk at 11:11am, the peak of the eclipse in my area, and there was a couple sitting on the curb, trying to catch a glimpse of the eclipse with a metal strainer. They were talking with a stranger, who just so happened to have eclipse glasses. He let each of us borrow them. I saw the eclipse, and it was the coolest thing ever! I’ve never seen any eclipse in real time, and this will probably be the only solar eclipse I see in my lifetime, as the next one won’t occur until 2044 or 2045. So it was really special! Cheers! I hope you were able to enjoy the solar eclipse.

Photo by Unsplash in collaboration with Alex Shuper

love you for all eternity

how can i be more for you,
calm all of your fears?
i long so desperately
to wipe away all your tears
you left in the dark,
a whirl of emotion
i felt it immediately,
though no words were spoken
want nothing more than
you to feel free
for the world
to see your authenticity
your beautiful soul, may it take flight
may the burdens you carry
disappear into night
may you feel the depth of my love,
despite my mistakes
may you always remember I’m here
when your heart breaks
bound by soul and maternally
i will love you here and for all eternity

Photo by J W on Unsplash

forever shimmering

may my heart always be open
no matter how broken
sail through to the light
on the other side
may i be like the tides
take each challenge in stride
ebb and flow to the beat of my own drum
when i feel like i’m failing
bad decisions i’m making
may i be determined to fight, not flee
despite feeling cheated
occasionally defeated
there’s a fire inside,
a courage that guides
when hope seems to have disappeared
may i be like the ocean
though perpetually in motion
forever shimmering reflectively


Photo by Rafael Garcin on Unsplash

in my bones

gentle breezes tease
through the rolled-down window of my car
feel it through my teeth
and long for something so much more
let the cool air chill me,
makes me feel alive
dulls the hankering to exit
long before the clock strikes five
how the summer wind is beckoning,
feel it in my bones
i am surely reckoning,
chasing the unknown
enough of these old skeletons
that shackle me in dark
send them off to neverland
none too soon to depart
for the winds of change are whispering
feel it in my bones
take me to my soul’s past
a place that i called home


Photo by Alexandra Leru on Unsplash

look to the evening sky

look to the evening sky due west,
a blazing orangescape
gloriously sketched,
a still frame of fire
and gauzy clouds that
enshrouds Mother Earth
she spins in time,
never skipping a beat
scattered light
across heaven’s deep,
i am bedazzled,
no longer frazzled by
the prattle of the day
crimson and amber
chase my worries away
no longer to doubt
what i am about
finding peace,
rest in
 ease 
all is well within
and with the world


Faith’s Hymn by Beautiful Chorus ❤ This poem has gone through some revisions since initial post.

Photo by João Costa on Unsplash

wild ride in your little red corvette

take a wild ride down PCH
in your little red corvette
all our worries we’ll assuage
as we race against the wind
top down, radio booming
taste the salty air
the smile on your lips
makes me high
must forgive me if i stare
you reach and take
my hand in yours,
the other’s on the wheel
those steely blues
gazing into mine
always make me reel
takin’ a wild ride down PCH
in your little red corvette
time spent with you, babe,
never shall i regret


Bioluminescence by Goth Babe. This is such a fun, happy song, and the video is stunning. Let’s make for the ocean!

Photo by Nicole Herrero on Unsplash

jarble in my head

it’s a chilly monday morning,
and i can’t get out of bed
all kinds of mixed up jarble
running through my thick head
pay the rent, do the laundry
all the things i dread
but i can’t move a damn muscle
‘cuz my body feels like lead
perhaps i’ll spend the day
doing absolutely nothing
lie in wait between the sheets,
banish all the rushing,
but then the jarble in my head
might tell me i’m a loser
guess it’s perfectly okay
to have a day that’s
less than mediocre


Sunshine by Transviolet. It’s one of those days, the kind where doing nothing feels really good. Today’s a holiday, so I’m enjoying a 3-day weekend. It’s a small miracle!

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash