catch you on
the next moonbeam
ride the constellations
away downstream
wallow in the deep
dream a little dream
as we dance among
the shimmering stars
towards neon light,
the night is ours!
Photo by David Becker on Unsplash
here am i
a breath and a sigh
away from you
you and i were going places
feeling safe, like homeostasis
then you left without a word
no promises did we make
yet to be erased,
left to wonder, was i replaced?
such a silly thing
to fall so hard for you
ignored the signs, this is what you do
lesson learned, no regrets
i’ll behave, still left to guess
you’ve moved on
lest i forget
get tangled up in love, a foolish roulette
Foo Fighters, “Stranger Things Have Happened”
Photo by Lenstravelier on Unsplash
left on an early weekend morn
despite the pity
and the scorn
the sun shone brightly
belied tears cried nightly
because of you
left a houseful of memories,
my dog, baby grand
no one could stop me,
what I had planned
weeks, months in the dark
alone in the crazy,
had i missed the mark?
running and faded
beyond jaded
part of me died
lucky i survived
free me, i will take my stand
free me, this i demand
to walk away, i knew i’d pay
for my sanity
embraced the gravity
to be free
no way in hell
can you stop me
free me, i will take my stand
free me, this i demand
beginning to end
on this i depend
that i will be free
ain’t no way
can you take it away
“Free Me” by Foo Fighters. This song has been on repeat. I’ve been listening to their earlier stuff as well as their latest album. It takes time to live in each song, learn the lyrics, and feel the vibe. This is one of those songs that so clearly resonates. I’ve worked hard to earn free.
Photo by Gary Meulemans on Unsplash
didn’t think the day would ever end
soul weary, tired and spent
feeling distorted,
body contorted
pushed too far
pretty sure i missed my star
keep looking for my pot of gold
at the end of the rainbow
someone please let the light in
miss the warmth of your touch
on my skin
thoughts of seeing you again
the only thing that keeps me sane
Yesterday was a tough day. You know, the kind where you have to grind it out. I hate wishing for time to pass, but it’s been a long week. Halfway through. There just aren’t enough hours in the day for play.
Photo by Filipp Romanovski on Unsplash
let the music play on
for therein is real magic
sweet melody,
like the air i breathe
life fades away
angels and devils at play
songs that save my soul
this brokenness indeed made whole
forever young, forever free
give me the beat of a drum
and i’ll soar for eternity
This song by the Foo Fighters, “Rest,” is like a lullaby of sorts. Although I’m not sure of the meaning, I feel that it’s a tribute to Foo Fighters’ beloved drummer, Taylor Hawkins, who died in 2022. I was so saddened by the news of his death believed to have been caused by a drug overdose and an enlarged heart, as I’m a huge Taylor Hawkins fan. There are some great rock n’ roll drummers, including Dave Grohl, but there is something about Hawkins that I loved. The way to my heart will always be through music ♡ Wish that I had more experience drumming!
Feature Photo Taylor Hawkins performing in 2018 CC BY 2.0. Credit: Raph PH
lost inside my head
too soon to forget
you’ve got me aching
helplessly craving
your lips on mine
like sweet, sweet summertime
riding the surf with you
what is it you do
that gets me so high?
can’t deny
the madness between us
you’re my latest weakness
but i don’t mind
cuz you make me feel so, so fine
wade into you every time
Would like to set this to music, a song?
Foo Fighters, “Show Me How,” featuring his daughter, Violet, on vocals. I love the vibe of this song. I get inspired by music to write..
Feature Photo by Unsplash in coordination with Natalia Blauth
hey girl,
what’s that you say
you’re tired of giving your heart away?
far too feckless
honey’d and reckless
on this cold, moonless night
said you’re looking for Mr Right
but took a wrong turn, yeah took to flight
fled the enemy
goddamn the dastardly
fooled you once, twice maybe
you’re a big girl now
shake it off baby
live another day,
don’t let it get away
trust that there’s more, more than this
more than just a lover’s kiss
love letters to myself
take a beat, or take twelve
’cause you are gold
can’t you see?
keep your heart open,
yeah, own your ‘free’
“Take Twelve” by jazz trumpeter, Lee Morgan, performed by the Lee Morgan Quintet
Photo by Seth Doyle on Unsplash
I hope you’re enjoying a restful, restorative weekend! I just wanted to take a moment to say thank you for visiting and taking time to read my poems, posts, etc. It truly means the world. It’s laughable, I never thought I’d ever write poetry. Okay, so it’s not great poetry, but the process is incredibly rewarding and even more so, healing.
I have loved writing since the time I could hold a pencil. Yes, I was that geek in school with the straight bangs and glasses who loved, yes loved, practicing cursive. The act of forming each letter was like art.
I started this blog in 2010 primarily upon the encouragement of a group of individuals I knew in high school, and a teacher who was very well liked by the students, Carole Ann Kaplan. We all created WordPress blogs and began posting stuff. Since then, so many other platforms to write and subscribe to have popped up. My posts began as a journey to find my birthfamily in Taiwan. I wrote a memoir about that journey. Things have changed tremendously since then, and the book would be much, much different now…I don’t write about adoption very often anymore, but elements of grief and loss, attachment, rejection, okay, yes, unrequited love, and longing that I’ve experienced as a result of adoption, I’m sure, influence my prose.
So, thank you, dear readers for following this blog, reading my silly poems, and sharing space with me. It’s really nice to read your posts as well, and I”m grateful for the support. Happy writing, and may you have a lovely rest of your day.
Photo by Wilhelm Gunkel on Unsplash
Enjoy this beautiful tune! A friend recently introduced me to Father John Misty, though he’s been around for awhile. I’ve had this song on repeat 🙂
where do i start?
you had my heart at beautiful
and now I’m falling,
falling for you
till the sky dusks purple, eventide
thoughts of you
day for night
feel your breath
let’s make for the moon
under the stars,
so brightly strewn
i’m into you
like wind to waves
sweet memories of you replay
you are a spring tide
at the new moon
you pull me in,
pull me under
can we stay like this together?
lost in the undertow,
i’d gladly drown in the afterglow
over and over
to be with you
sun, moon, and earth align
careless whispers,
you are mine
Photo by Matthew Hume on Unsplash
Happy Saturday! It has been one of those weeks, the kind that you can’t wait to be over. Busy and exhausting. I’m so glad it’s the weekend. Time to rest and restore. And write mindless poems. The song below by Goth Babe partly inspired this one, despite the surfing on the snow in the video, lol.
Cheers, thank you for visiting, and may you enjoy your weekend!
let me wrap myself in you
so deeply that
i feel your thoughts
and
breathe you in
so deeply that
i know your rhythm
and
move with you so deeply
that the breath in me
is the breath in you
and
the light in me
is the light in you
let me see to your soul
and
all that you are
may you see into mine,
all that i am
and love me no matter
Photo by Ahmet Sali on Unsplash
you want me to be
you want me to feel
you want me to see,
want me to agree
when all i want,
all i want
is to be fucking free
from you, even me
take the next exit and flee
from all that’s oppressing me
take your wants,
take your desires
may they drown with you
in your lies,
all the mire
better off without you
don’t need a rescue
no longer a mask i wear
you cannot touch me,
this i swear
staring at the same mossy-green wall,
my office space
what dreams i chase as i sit and meditate
on the long day before me,
all the people to see
how i’d rather be free,
dissident of the mundane
a bit like Ozzy’s Crazy Train
longing for the atmospheric,
yes, the esoteric
music with all the feels
rhythm that gives me chills
seeking that little spark
oh, oh, oh
must i embark
on the path laid before me,
stealing moments in between
to write silly poetry?
Photo by Clem Onojeghuo on Unsplash
dance, dance
dance at dawn
headphones on
no regrets
dance, dance
in the dark
between the shadows
and the stars
dance, dance
like there’s
no tomorrow
like no one’s watching
to hell with sorrow
dance, dance
you
out of my heart
out of my head
too soon to depart
dance, dance
be free,
be wild
remember your touch,
always your smile
I’m digging this new tune by Rob Grant, Lana Del Rey, and ANNA…Takes my breath away.
I think dance is one of the most beautiful of art forms. I find myself dancing, headphones on and music blaring, with abandon all the time.
Cheers to slow dancing and getting lost between the shadows.
Photo by Olenka Kotyk on Unsplash
on a friday
i realize i haven’t
seen you
in a week
on a friday
i imagine your face,
kissing your cheek
thoughts of you
ever present
no matter how
desperately i circumvent
i’m enraptured,
utterly enamored
of you
So, it’s not actually Friday, but this poem has been sitting in the wings for a while now. From my little quiet corner of the world, Happy Lunar New Year!
Photo by Lerone Pieters on Unsplash
don’t look too closely
don’t be surprised
when you look at me,
look into my eyes
you see what you see
you see what you want
it’s a brilliant disguise
the most clever of fronts
for to hell and back
there i have been
escaped from oppression
a certain depression
the experiences of my life
held in every scar
memories too vivid
imprinted in mar
and yet here I am
picking up the pieces
the uncertainty of it all
never ceases
though i cannot stop the waves,
this existence i live in
i choose to let go,
bygones forgiven
Feature Photo by Jonny Gios on Unsplash
i wish upon the stars,
tell them all my secrets
they shimmer and spin about
like a giant disco ball
pirouetting on high
it is said that
when you wish upon a star
anything your heart desires
will come true
and i melt,
the memory of your lips
so present and persistent,
clinging to me
like my favorite perfume
i wish this wish upon the stars
i wish it may come true
i wish for you
It is a dreadfully wet, rainy, and cold Monday. Flash flood warnings since yesterday, and more rain to come over the next few days. So, with the rain comes another silly love poem. To my fellow Los Angelenos, stay safe and dry.
Feature Photo by Tom Gainor on Unsplash
monday mellow
makes me moody,
melancholy,
manic,
a little might broody
mistrustful of this malaise,
i crawl back in bed
to mindfully muse
and read instead
so, don’t mind me
i’m feeling quite staid
is mercury again
in retrograde??
the scream that
no one else hears,
concealed behind
beguiling soft eyes,
and yeses
is the color of rage
Photo by Yusuf Sabqi on Unsplash
clouds float by drowsily
on this hazy, rainy day
shifting, drifting
giving shape to the sky
reminds me of how
you love me,
soft and slow
as though we have
all the time in the world
Photo by Valery Rabchenyuk on Unsplash
I’m so inspired by Max Richter’s, Spring. It never ceases to mesmerize. This little poem came from Spring. These words cannot adequately express how this piece makes me feel ❤
dancing am i,
caressed by golden light
in the warmest embrace
spirit soaring –
each beat of my heart
pulsing in time
to a rhythm all its own
with each sacred strain,
a composer’s dream
can you hear it?
body rippling,
turning, swelling
like the surging energy
traversing through ocean waves,
defying time and order
such sweet intoxication!
Feature Photo by Abdul Azeez Garbadeen on Unsplash
half the days
i think of you
twice the other half,
i think of
how
i don’t want
to think of you,
swear you off instead
by shinedown
I heard this song on the radio yesterday on my commute home from work. Had to look it up. Totally get the lyrics and love the melody. Full lyrics here:
Chorus:
Sometimes I’m in a room where I don’t belong
And the house is on fire and there’s no alarm
And the walls are melting too
How ’bout you?
I’ve never been the favorite, thought I’d seen it all
‘Til I got my invitation to the lunatic ball
And my friends are coming too
How ’bout you?
Don’t worry, it’s all just a symptom of being human…
Official Video:
Feature Photo by Daniel Lincoln on Unsplash
morning blushes,
soft light begs entry
through the tiny cracks
in my window
I sigh,
not ready to greet the day
longing to return to that place,
that distant, starry place
in my dreams
where time and sense
are nonexistent,
and all that matters is you and me,
the pair of us
illuminated like an iridescent flame,
a warming glow that never fades
and never grows cold-
we dance till dusk
to the music of Sirius
under a canopy of glittering stars
until I am blushing,
every inch of me
like trees flowering in summer–
the dream weaver softly casts his charms
and I sigh,
…morning shall have to wait
My astrology today said
that my heart is afraid
to speak out loud.
I suppose it’s true.
Is it because i’m a Virgo,
wallflower that I am,
“sweet,” i’ve been told
to my great chagrin,
or fear that should my heart
speak too loudly,
you will disappear?
I could not bear that
so silence faint heart,
now and forevermore!
Do not speak,
for to have you near
is far better than my achy heart
to speak aloud.
Photo by Milad Fakurian on Unsplash
let us dance
in the secret garden
barefoot and free
scattering light like tiny fireflies
across the shadowy sky
and
breathing magic
into the silky air
Wishing I had a microwave to heat up my
now cup of cold brew.
Who likes cold brew on a chilly December morn?
More than that,
wishing for you.
If you weren’t here
and I weren’t there,
perhaps we’d have a chance.
Or would our stories be too much-
the hurts and silly quirks,
the painful truth that what is,
is?
We cannot change the past,
and time and healing wait for no one-
not in this world,
not in this dimension.
I say, this is enough-
I needn’t fear that
someday you will disappear
or I will disappear
or I will ever forget you,
this time,
this place,
this sweet connection.
Begone sorrow,
surrender to what is!
Be here now-
stolen, tender moments to be cherished.
…If only it were that simple.
Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash
she had a superpower
like no other
she could make herself so small,
so slight
as to disappear,
like camouflage
against the noise and chatter,
the barbs and stings
no one knew she existed
in stillness and silence
not a sound she’d make
save for the beating of her small heart,
gentle breath
that reminded her
she was alive
Photo by dominik hofbauer on Unsplash
I murmured your name
in the quiet shallows of the eve,
and who but the moon whispered back
in silvery, hushed tones.
“They were never yours to keep, love,” said she.
And the sly wind woefully swept away my tears.
i cannot feel this way about you
just when I’ve reduced you to background noise
you find your way back to me
like that old 80s song that I love
playing on the radio
bringing me back to the way we were
to the way i imagine we could be,
note by bittersweet note
and without a single thought or hesitation
i follow
a heart full of hope,
feckless fool
In you is everything I’ve been missing.
You fill the space between the notes in perfect time.
I am lost in the rhythm of you and me,
a star-crossed rhapsody in blue and green.
I know not how the song will end.
In this moment, you are the sweetest melody;
I could sing you all day long.
This is a repost of an older poem I wrote some months back…
Photo by Karl Fredrickson on Unsplash
Musings of a Taiwanese American Adoptee 